Tag Archives: idea

I have a dream. Again…

Look who’s back! “Who dis?” I hear you say, and yes, you have every right to forget me – I’ve been gone for three months. In cybertime, that’s like a generation. I’m sure new Twitter stars have managed to rise and implode since then, but I wouldn’t have known. I was too busy getting married and starting my new job.

Speaking of getting married – look at this happy couple!

registry-steps   walking-in-cbd   nighttime-in-cbd-2

You almost can’t tell that it was 39 degrees Celsius, which is just over 100 degrees Fahrenheit…crazy, but that’s the January in Melbourne for ya! I know that some of you can’t feel your toes right now, but trust me – you wouldn’t want to feel like you are cooking alive, either.

And yes, I’ve been at my new awesome job for almost three months, and yes, it’s incredibly demanding, but enough excuses already. I want to tell you about a wonderful thing that happened yesterday.

I came home late, as usual. Good thing that Josh cooks, because if not, I’d be surviving on tuna cans and stale bread. Early to rise and late home from work makes Ana one tired woman. So tired that a mere thought of sitting down to finish that third book or even write a new blog post creates involuntary spasms in my legs, which usually results in a couch faceplant, supplemented with trash TV. Every now and then I would also feel intense regret that the writing dream is over, and then pass out to start the early-to-rise cycle all over again. Sounds familiar? Yeah, it sucks.

I’ve tried beating myself up, writing daily plans, and setting up a reward system, but nothing was working. That is, until yesterday. I was in the shower, trying to wash off the daily stress, when I sort of spaced out. I was fantasizing about how my life could be different, when a story idea came to me, as vivid and real as one of those hallucinations I had when I was high on opiates in the hospital bed. When I came to, the bathroom was full of steam and my mind was full of plot twists, characters, and whole scenes.

My sister-in-law came over to have dinner and watch “Married at First Sight,” so I had to play hostess for a couple of hours, but all I could think of was the new story. I could not wait for the stupid show to be over, so that I could write down the idea, I was that afraid to lose it. I jumped onto the computer as soon as I could and did not get off the chair until Josh started yelling from the other bedroom that we had to get some sleep. I could not stop thinking about it this morning. I told my sister. She liked it. In fact, her exact words were: “Yep, here we go again!”

Yes, indeed. Here we go. A completely different new novel, a psychological thriller with little comedy, if any. A male protagonist. More character development, although I’m in love with the plot too. And I have a feeling I will be able to spill it onto the page in a couple of months – last night I could barely keep up with typing out the ideas as they were flooding in.

I don’t know what you’ve been up to in the last three months, and sorry again for disappearing, but if you’ve been self-beating and self-hating over a writer’s block, perhaps it’s time to try spacing out in a hot shower. Let me know how you go.


Filed under General thoughts

Why dream about tomorrow, when you can live it today?

I’m about to do something completely insane. I can’t believe it, but here it is:

I’m going to take six months off work.

It’s only seems insane, of course, because of my Soviet childhood (constant poverty) and American young adulthood (poverty during student years, replaced with “work like hell till retirement” mentality). Australians actually tend to take a gap year almost as a rite of passage into adulthood – travel the world and all that.

I’ve done the calculations – I can afford the bills, because I have a month of vacation and two months of “long service leave” accumulated. (Again, apologies to my hard-working American friends – I never knew of the long service leave concept until I moved down under). The plan is to turn three months of paid leave into six months of half-pay. There will be just a bit of travel, with already booked pre-honeymoon in December and a “proper” honeymoon in May, but otherwise it will be a 40-hour a week writing dream. The plan is to “try out” this writing gig full-time – write two sequels to Shizzle, Inc and really see what it would be like to work as an author.

I don’t know what will happen at the end – maybe I’d find that I miss the office and will come back with a vengeance, ready to climb the corporate ladder. Or I’d learn to appreciate the financial peace of mind my current job provides. Of course, I secretly hope that with two more books under the belt I might get the fuel necessary to make the dream I committed to on 16 October actually possible. Regardless, it will be the longest ever break from office and an adventure into a parallel reality all of my own making.

My mind is made up. Now I just have to convince my manager that it’s a good idea…


Filed under Shizzle, Inc.